Single moms and the dating scene.

First, I will say that there is a difference between a single woman and a single mom.  A single woman only has to look out for herself, a single mom has to look out for herself but more importantly, her children.  Every minute of a single mom's day is filled with one thing or another having to do with her children and working to get money to feed them and provide what they need especially if it is a situation that the "other parent" is not involved and does not help support the children.

So how does an exhausted, over-worked, stretched to the max, single mom go about finding a nice, trust-worthy man to spend time with?  If anyone has a good answer for this, let me know.......There are no less than 40 different commercials on TV at any given time of the day or night boasting how singles can meet online, and their success rates are amazing so I decided to check it out just to see for myself what one might find there.

If you google online dating sites, your computer might explode since there are so, so many.  I just randomly picked a few and searched a few profiles.  Many of these profiles looked really fake and just so forced.  Men trying to make themselves appear better than they actually are.  One profile in particular really got my attention, not in a good way though.  This guy had so many red flags that I just wanted to share a little bit about what things in a profile you might want to avoid like the plaque.

Let me just say, I am not going to give the name that this poor guy used, I am not quoting directly, and I am not giving out information about the site that this info is on because that is not my point, I just want to point out things that might look suspicious or not real to maybe help out a fellow single mom, and no, I am not claiming to be an expert profile reader but a person can make a fake profile just as easily as he can make a real one.  Just sayin........... and if he has time to sit around making fake profiles, he is probably not the best choice.

So the profile said things like this.  He is a man looking for a woman, aged 30.  This is not  a picky guy either as he is interested in Asian/Black/Latino or mixed race woman.  Red flag:  This is telling me that this guy will date anyone and everyone or anyone who will have him.  Desperate! In my opinion.  He states that he is 6 feet or above.  Does his height change?  He states he is separated but does not elaborate.  Is he separated from his wife, his live in girlfriend, his other girlfriends?  Exactly who does he mean here?  Anyone that claims to be separated, you should probably be a little cautious of because you really do not want to date a guy that is already taken even if it is only in the legal sense-dramaaaaaa..  He also points out that he has children but not at home and the next statement says he can't have children.  I am not sure what this means.  How many children are there?  And does this mean he has children that he does not have custody of and he can't have his children around him at his home?  Or that he did the world a favor and made sure he could not have any more children?  Who knows?  He claims to have some college, maybe clown college, he does not smoke but he does not mind if you do, and he is a social drinker.

His description states that he loves life, the lake, he loves to jet ski, and relax by the beach.  He also likes going to the mountains and relax in the fresh air and the gentle cool breeze.  He obviously has a lot of free time.  He just love being outside, he loves to cook, and work around the house.  Sounds like a winner!  He also works for public service.  The sad thing here is that there are so many evil people working for public service, they know how to work the system to their advantage.  He also boasts about owning his own business in which he uses his vehicle for and that is why he does not All I can say here is that I image Sanford and Son when I think of this.  An old man driving around in a piece of garbage truck.  He is also a drummer in a local band.  A 45-year-old rock-n-roll dude!  Run!  He does not claim to be rich or poor.  So he most likely does not have a lot of money.  He believes that things happen for a reason.  I am not sure why anyone would point that out, maybe he experiences a lot of karma for things he has done?  He claims to be a hard working man.  He is a honest man.  I think if someone has to point that out, it is probably not the truth.  He is an energetic man and motivated.  He believes he has enough energy and motivation left in him to last a good many more years.  I don't even want to know what this means.  So to sum it up, if you are looking for an honest, hard working, and passionate guy, he is your man.  This is a definite red flag.  It just sounds so corny.  I saw the profile pictures and all I saw was an aging, leathery-faced man that probably threw away everything good in his life and is now just an old, desperate guy living at home with his mommy and daddy complaining about how the world has done him wrong.  Poor guy!

drive a fancy car.

So I think just from this one profile that the online dating scene might not be all it is cracked up to be. I will continue to research this idea of where single moms can meet real, honest, decent men and post as I go.  There has to be a better way than this.

Here is another post I wrote about single moms and dating.

Remember too, never let your kids meet anyone that has not been around for a while and who you think is a trustworthy person.  There is no reason for your kids to get involved in your personal dating life unless you know the person and think they might be a keeper.